Day 19

Haven’t written for a few days. The weekend just been was pretty horrific, but not due to booze, I came down with the god awful flu-like symptoms, I say flu-like because it wasn’t the real flu as it only lasted 3 days, but it was that body aching, shaking, no strength, muzzy head, sore throat, snotty nose feeling and to top it all off I HAD to go into work the Saturday which was the first day I had it and it was mad busy at work. Sunday I stayed in bed the whole day and Monday I had to help my mum pack to go back home, she’s been visiting for a year so it was quite a big task. Tuesday was back to work. So I’m feeling better – still snotty nosed and slightly run down but way better than I was. The good thing was though that the drinking thoughts were limited as I felt so crap all I could think was that drinking would only make tomorrow much worse and I totally couldn’t have handled that.

I spent a lot of that week crying, whether it was the sickness, the no booze, the rundown-ness I don’t know but it felt quite good, sad but good, a release of emotions.

I’ve a late night tonight at work so no drinking and by tomorrow night I have a feeling I’ll be so bloody shattered that it’ll be Chinese takeaway, soaps and bed. Working Saturday and Sunday Monday off with NO plans and NO intention of making any – I think I might need a little downtime.

I need to make some self-care plans at the moment I’m eating crap, nil exercise, working all the hours under the sun and getting totally run down.



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